Mad Men Season 5 Episode 12 recap

These past few episodes have been hard to handle. The drama! The revelations! The feelings they make me feel! Spoilers abound.

This episode opens with Don and Lane being congratulated on their respective career successes. Following the signing of Jaguar, Don is not satisfied with the current direction the company is going in. He wants bigger, better, more. With Roger's help, they arrange a meeting with Firestone, where Don gives a pitch that's beyond assertive. It is in a bold, self-assured tone which proudly declares that he "won't settle for 50 percent of anything." There are more than a few references to consumerism in his pitch, which stands in stark contrast to Kinsey's hippie antics in the last episode. This pitch reeks of capitalism; strong ideas unwelcome in today's 99 percent world, perhaps. 

In a dramatic plot point, Lane is called out on his embezzling, and Don forces him to resign. Due to his failure at work and a rather detached relationship with his wife, Lane is pushed to suicide. Lane's marriage plays off Don's rather nicely; when Don comes home from work, he is comfortable telling Megan about Lane's misdemeanour, and she immediately sympathises with Don, to the extent of putting her own grouses on the back burner. Lane's wife, however, has bought him a new Jaguar, ignorant of the fact that Lane was very much in debt. She makes him take her out to dinner, and there is a marked disconnect in the way they communicate. Lane fails to have an open relationship with his wife, and he is unable to confide in her, while she incessantly places demands on him.

There is also a sad irony when Lane initially tries to gas himself out in a Jaguar, the very account that SCDP just signed. He fails at this, resorting instead to hang himself in his office. Work was all he lived for, and yet it was also his undoing. It's a rather macabre, vengeful move of his, to ensure that his colleagues discovered his body. The graphic depiction of his dead body underlies this fact. War veteran Don insists on carrying down the hanging corpse, and Lane's dead body literally physically confronts Don about its death. Obviously Don feels guilty, and it's very rare that this confident ad man shows remorse. He keeps a dead man's secret, though, and does not reveal to the rest of the office that Lane stole from the company. It might be to keep the dignified memory of Lane intact, but it is also partly to save himself from blame. 

Sally also does her share of personal growth in this episode, and establishes herself as a pre-teen who knows how to get what she wants. She stubbornly refuses to get out of a family ski trip and gets sent to her father's house for the weekend, only to come running back home when she gets her first period. Betty tells Megan that Sally "needs her mother" at this time, clearly marking her territorial boundaries. It establishes, for Betty, that there are some things that Megan cannot handle. Betty fulfills her nurturing role quite well, cuddling Sally and giving her daughter a hot water bottle. 

We are nearing the end of the season, and this episode has been pretty eventful. The writers have a lot to live up to for the season finale. Maybe another death? The SCDP offices have been quite the battleground this season.

gay stuff again.

so what that I'm not out to my parents?
why am I made to feel long-suffering and less-than for being closeted? I don't think it's a sad thing. I'm not sad. It's my own bloody decision not to tell my parents that I'm gay ok. It doesn't mean I live any less of a life. Thanks for your condescension.

I hate it when people pity me. Don't do it if you are at all intelligent, please.

Ever heard of cultural relativity?

aka do you know how screwed I would be if I came out to my parents? I don't necessarily want a rainbows and unicorns relationship with my parents. I don't think it'll ever happen. You can't force something to happen even if you want it to happen. The only way I know how to get along better with my parents is to listen to them and argue less and be a "better daughter", whatever the fuck that means. That usually works. This would mean not going to leakycon, taking summer classes in london, not going out with friends, not drinking, not doing anthropology and doing law or medicine or engineering or architecture instead, not reading fiction, applying to every fucking university my mum wants me to apply to, regardless of COUNTRY the university is in, (last week she was like, "oh, why don't you transfer to the university of chicago next year? why don't you transfer to SOAS next year?") not staying out after dark, not volunteering, not life modeling, not uploading videos of myself to youtube.

If I told them about my personal life and if I was gay, they would get angry, it would be something else for us to fight over, = not productive, yes? The less they know about me, the less they would get angry over, and the less stuff in my life not concerning them I would have to compromise over.

It just feels that every little thing that I enjoy doing and I do a lot of, my mum has to step in and tell me not to do it, or that it's bad to do it. Every time I have to make a decision concerning them, I have to have my mum to agree, then my dad. It's exhausting and annoying and troublesome to have to discuss everything with both of them, so I don't.

My therapist has said that like anything, my parents would need time to adjust to a change in my life, if I were to come out as gay. It is true, to a certain extent. For example, my parents took time to adjust to the fact that I'm mostly vegetarian, and six years on, they're okay with it, and my mum even looks out for food that I like to eat. She's tried food that she has been hesitant to try before, and buys food home even if my sister or my grandparents won't eat it.

But for other, I guess more crucial career/academic decisions, my dad especially is stubborn. When he came to visit me last, he kept asking me to "do something professional" and to "do something useful", and hasn't come around to me studying anthropology. I don't think he'll ever come around. It just feels very hurtful when it is implied that what I'm studying isn't useful, or that the 3 weeks of production running and stewarding is useless and a "waste of my time". bullshit. To feel that the hard work you do is seen as "nothing" is horrible.

I hate talking to my parents, now that I don't live with them. It makes me feel anxious and stressed. I don't want to make matters worse by bringing up something that will make conversations even more tense.

I'm also... scared to tell them about my personal life. I feel like I might get in trouble for it, and they'll be mad at me.

I don't want to feel forced to come out; I hate it. It's fucking ridiculous, though. This "coming out" shit is not even brought up when I hang out with other gay people in singapore. It's understood that parents are conservative, and there are just some things that some parents prefer not to know about their kids. Gayness is not usually something you'd talk about with your parents. I only feel forced to come out to my parents here in london/ when I was in the US for a while.

musings

Context: 

1. famous sg blogger xiaxue had haters on her facebook photos, who left typical hater comments.

2. she decides to retaliate by posting their full names and their family photos on her blog, so everyone knows who they are.

3. the straits times (national newspaper) lauds her for doing this, portrays her in a good light

4. People respond.

   a) My friend June writes a blog about it, one of the comments on this blog highlights an example of how xiaxue victim-blames, in terms of rape culture.

   b) I respond! kind of.

First. I read the blogpost where xiaxue victim-blames, and when I first read it a few years ago, I didn't think much of it. Thought that xiaxue was being her usual controversial-opinion-self. That is, she blogs about something controversial just for the sake of it, and to get more hits. 

Now I'm reading it, and I can't have an unbiased opinion on it, because it's triggering for me. This triggering feeling is in relation to the rape discussed, and it just makes me feel really uncomfortable. It's not a detached feeling, it's just that it feels too close to home and I don't like it. (trying to sort out what I think here.) 

So. The commenters on June's blog say that this is an example that xiaxue is really misogynistic, and therefore, the recent action against male haters on facebook cannot be described as "feminist". But I don't get it. In school (literature, social anthropology) if we want to describe something as "feminist", in literature we base it mostly on textual evidence, and we don't say something is feminist just because the author is feminist. In social anthropology, something is feminist or post modern or whatever because of the time the article is written. We compare the text to other texts that have come before it, and to other texts written in its time. The text can be seen as a reaction to what has happened before, or the prevailing mentality during the time it was written. 

Because of this, I find the argument that "xiaxue is not feminist" inherently flawed, because in literature and social anthropology, you judge if a person is feminist based on his/her texts, not his person. There usually is one key text that essay-writers cite a lot that illustrates his stand on the matter, and we don't usually track what this person has said over time. There are exceptions though. Like Mary Douglas was very structuralist when she first wrote her Lele ethnographies but recently she's pulled back a bit, and her stand has become less radical. 

Back to my point! The point is, that referring to what xiaxue has written in the past to help shape our opinions on what she is like now feels like a personal attack. In academia, personal attacks are always frowned upon, are they not? (I've been to lectures where people present their papers, and professional colleagues present their opinions on the paper that is presented in a very civilized manner. Usually.) Therefore, our claim that xiaxue is not feminist is invalid. But this does not mean that xiaxue is feminist. We have to analyze her most recent text to determine if this is so. 

Of course, if the anthropologist is dead then it's harder to make personal attacks, and the attacks are on the argument the person made, not the person. Last I checked, xiaxue is still alive, there are people who know her, and there are people who will go "you know, this one time, I saw xiaxue doing this and this..." All of which contribute to our public perception of her, and in this case, whether she is feminist or not. 

Obviously also xiaxue is not in academia. She's a public personality, and so the reactions to what she says don't follow academic rules, but whatever rules the public sees fit. I brought up academic rules because they are logical, and helps us decide if we agree or disagree to something in an organized way. (I like academia. It mostly consists of smart, well informed, and in the case of social anthropologists, not heteronormative people. But I digress.) Public response to a piece of media is going to be anything but civil and organized. 

hmm. I don't find it logical to pull up something that she's written in the past to contribute to our judgement of the latest blogpost. It's not professional (ok basically I think it's stupid and confusing) to make personal attacks on the person, when what you really want to discuss is the morality of a particular set of actions. 

I'm also doubtful of the fact that the people on the internet who have responded to this incident think that it's okay to take pot shots at xiaxue's morality and forget that she, like any other person, is complex. At this point, xiaxue seems like a straw man. Which is all entertaining and convenient for people, I guess.

the internet and its usefulness

today one of the actresses bought me a drink. ^__^ I guess she just felt sorry for me and I felt so bad. sigh. Like I feel bad if someone buys me a drink because most of the people who hang out with me are just as skint as I am. This is not the point~ the point is.

She asked me what I did in my spare time, and I said I played the ukulele (default answer now. I mean the truth is that I well read and tumblr and cry while watching videos and do the laundry but those aren't interesting things, are they?) Then she asked how I learnt how to play it, and I said the internet. and then I answered her earlier question, "How did you find out about this volunteer opportunity?" by saying that I found it from the internet. So then she calls me an "internet buff". I guess well she's from another generation entirely, or another kind of person entirely... okay well she's not the type of person I'd usually hang out with.

I just feel a little bothered by this. The way she said it made it sound like I was someone incapable of doing anything outside the internet. Now I feel like I have something to prove, that I need to prove that I'm able to do something/ make social connections without the internet. But the truth is, I can't. I literally can't do anything now without it.

I'm searching for directions to get to my mystery shopping job, and what do I use? The internet.
I'm looking for a new flat now, and I use the internet.
I look for jobs? internet.
Life modeling gigs? internet.
Even the place in my uni was done through UCAS (okay, granted, there _is_ no other more efficient way to do this, and *everyone* goes through this system) and where's UCAS? the internet.

I guess I grew up with the internet, and every single aspect of how I live is done through it. It's so quick and easy. The actress asked if I learnt how to play the ukulele from a book, and like. Dude, if I learnt how to play the ukulele from a book, I would have given up by now. I was spoilt and fickle enough to not want to go through strum patterns or ALL of the chords or music theory to learn how to play properly. I just wanted to be able to play along with my favorite songs. I can get the chords for my favorite songs from the internet. I can't get specific chords from a book. During the ukulele society session at my uni which I went to, we played songs that I hadn't heard before, and I wouldn't have played those songs if I were learning the ukulele on my own.

Who wants to learn how to play "Old Jamaican Road" or whatever when they first start? It's already hard to teach your fingers to remember the chords, and for your fingers to grow calluses. You don't want to make the experience more miserable by playing a stupid song that you don't even like, and knowing that there are songs that you like that you could potentially be playing, but you can't, because all you have is this dumb book.

The only time someone in real life taught me anything about the ukulele, when I first got it, were my friends who already had ukes. June (friend in singapore) taught me the chords to "creep", and I think I must have tried it out on her ukulele. Whenever my friends brought ukes to meetings, I was itching to touch them, and that's why I bought one. After that one song, and all I knew were 4 chords, I learnt everything else from watching people play stuff on youtube and from chord fingering lists.

No doubt there must have been ways of finding a job, volunteering opportunities, or a flat when the internet was not as popular, but I don't know them. There's the newspaper. My parents think that networking is very important to find a job, that "knowing people" is important. I feel like such a slimeball when I talk to people with the intention of getting something for myself. I'm rubbish at networking.

I feel there would have been more support surrounding non-internet resources when the internet was not as commonly used. By "support" I mean people whom you could ask, telephone lines which were actually manned by real people who wouldn't put you on hold, things like that.

Let's say I wanted to find a flat without using the internet when I just moved here. I'd go to my uni's accommodation service because I'm a first year, and I'm new to the area. I did that in september, and they were not helpful at all when I asked them about alternative housing since they had run out of space in halls. They just gave me a University of London Housing Services (ULHS) pamphlet, and wished me good luck. The ULHS covers *all* the colleges in London, including King's, Imperial--- colleges that were well within central London and were about 45min to an hour from where my school was. I ideally don't want to live in a place 1hr away from school. And I went through the rooms available through ULHS, and the nearest one was too far away. I would have needed to go to the physical ULHS office if it wasn't for the internet, which is stupid, or call them, which is also stupid, because I'll have to be like, "oh, I need this this and this in this area" and it would be a long phone call that I'm not comfortable making, because I'm not even paying them as agents.

I have to end this soon. Just. What I want to say IS that it's really inconvenient and sometimes impossible to do things without the internet for me. For someone to expect me to find volunteer opportunities through personal connections alone is weird because okay my friends in London are all students who go to my uni. Through them, I can only find volunteer opportunities within university societies. It's very limiting that way. I'm not used to that at all. I do volunteering in order to meet people outside of school, and to get to see free shows. Without the internet I wouldn't have known the show I'm currently working at exists, or if the company producing the show existed. Hell, without the internet, I don't think I'd be volunteering as much.

I understand that people used to be able to do it without the internet, and people still do, but I can't.

BEDA #30: the last one.

omg you guys.
omg.
today's the last day of BEDA. jeez. Can't believe I (almost) made it through.

I'm currently listening to Small Town Moon and trying to understand the lyrics. Thank you nicolas for being my regina spektor crack dealer.

I think in past BEDAs I've made the last day all epic and shit? Can't remember. Today's going to be pretty ordinary.

This morning I woke up with the announcement of the amanda palmer kickstarter on twitter, and by the end of today it had surpassed its $100 000 goal. Amanda Palmer fans are either 1) numerous or 2) have a lot of swag. Better get my backer thing in soon! She's going to have a show in my area! *faints* I have to buy a corset, or go thrifting again and find an appropriate amanda palmer outfit, and buy liquid eyeliner, and pale foundation. I might be able to walk around in a BRA AND NO SHIRT again, which will be fun. Hopefully it won't be too cold then. I need to find people to go with. My brethren. holy cow I might even shave my eyebrows again! :D did I mention how fun it was to shave my eyebrows the first time? yes. Need to do it again.

I really need to sleep early tonight; have a long day tomorrow.

ahahaha this is the funniest. I saw a realllly cheap flight price ($200 less than the price I was tracking) and just booked it. Now I have a TWENTY-ONE HOUR LAYOVER in Charlotte Douglas International. xD Go me. I don't even know where the **** is charlotte.

Is it Charlotte, NC? I will go google that. It _is_ charlotte, NC.

At least the thing I've been worrying about for ages is done. Do you know what I do in my SPARE TIME??? I track flight prices, like a hawk. To no productive end because I check and I look and speculate. Then I go away, and say I'm going to "wait a while longer". TURNS OUT, the longer I wait the higher it gets. No shit sherlock. Now it's DONE and I can sleep soundly (literally, because the other night I WENT TO SLEEP thinking about which dates I should fly on.) In the shower, I am counting how much I'm in debt to myself and how much I can afford. With this new flight price, I'm in less debt to myself! I'm this much closer to understanding why some people are saying "no" to leaky this year. Ah well.

BEDA #28: volunteering!

Hello pooky and nicolas!

I'm listening to Small Town Moon right now. 

and chloe just showed this to me. YET ANOTHER FANDOM that I may/may not be sucked into. I don't really like them lah, it's just that a lot of tumblr is really into them. I mean I get where the appeal comes from, they're quite hot to be honest. But I don't... it's not worth my mindspace to get really into.

I don't know what to talk about today. I realise that BEDA is winding down soon! I honestly think past years were more interesting than this year. I like being able to look back at them, though, because it's a small snapshot of what I was like and what I was into for that year. I used to have interesting topics because BEDA was a soapbox for me, but I think I've run out of things to soapbox. (it's a verb now. Because I made it so.)

I'm volunteering again! #happy

haha I don't know if it actually makes me happy or if I think it makes me happy, when I'm looking back at things. I like it most when I get lots of things to do, and it gets busy. It's strange, because when I have too many things to handle in my personal life when I'm not working, I get stressed and grumpy. But when I'm volunteering, and have a lot of things to handle at once, it's awesome. Probably because the implications of my actions don't really affect me, but the organisation that I'm working for. 

After working (the receptionist gig) for a bit I realise that I don't get the same satisfaction as volunteering. Maybe with volunteering it's because you're not being paid, so you have the feeling that you're doing something "good", and you get enjoyment out of that. Or maybe it was the job, because the receptionist gig was just a lot of data entry and filing. 

I like volunteering because I like the satisfaction of being in charge, and being responsible for things. Depending on the organization, I mostly feel proud about being a part of that organization, and being a part of something big. I like helping people too, and the satisfaction that comes from helping people. It's like a drug. I mostly don't get angry about volunteering, or feel that it's a waste of time. Like, I almost never get mad at the organization for using "free labour". haha maybe I haven't done it with enough organizations yet. But the ones which I've had the fortune to be at, I've met paid employees being very passionate about the job that they are doing, and being really stretched in terms of manpower. It just feels nice to be able to help out and lighten their load a bit. 

A friend who has been doing this for a while longer than me now-- think years-- is pretty jaded about doing work for free. He says you don't learn as much as you used to, and doesn't see the appeal in it anymore. I'll probably get to that stage. Until then, I'll just keep doing stuff that makes me happy. Doesn't hurt that I can get references and it looks good on my CV as well. ;D

BEDA #27: karen kavett???

AHH AHH AHH AHH KAREN FREAKING KAVETT IS LOOKING FOR A ROOM AT LEAKY

AHHHHHHHHHH

OMG

*flails*

OMG I JUST OFFERED HER OUR GROUP ROOM ARRANGEMENT THING

without asking the group. but if I wait till the whole group agrees, then she'll find a room with someone else. 

ok I think if I just take 5 hot minutes to think this through, it probably isn't a very good idea.

It is kind of win-win though, because we have a ~situation~ where 2 people don't want to room in our 7-person room, and they want to split, so it would offset the costs significantly if 1 more person came, and our 8-person group split into 2 rooms, instead of 5 in one room and 2 in the other. But the thing is that someone has to be the one to sleep with karen in the same bed :P because there are two doubles. And I'm not sure that the others in the group know of karen/ are comfortable with this. The rooming group was basically me/chloe/karen from norway, then chloe's friends, and then karen's friend, and the last person to join us is my roommate from last year. So we all are weakly connected to each other, and there are people who will vouch for someone I don't know. But I don't know karen kavett personally, having only talked to her once ever. xD and she probably doesn't know me. 

haha I don't think she'll room with us. She has a wide enough network of people she knows at Leaky to be able to room with them, I think. But then why would she advertise her roomless-ness on twitter?

On a completely different note, I just found out at least 2 members of sick of sarah (the band that I was crushing over) flunked out of college. The sad sinking feeling.~~~ They didn't flunk out of college recently, they just said it in an interview. I feel so disappointed now. hahaha also reminded about how I can't flunk college because it's all I have and I've spent at least 12 years of life agonizing over. I mean really when you've realized that you've spent most of your life working on something you aren't really good at in the first place, you realize you're in a bit of a pickle. It's either academics or bust. I don't have a plan B. 

I didn't stick it out through the torture of secondary school and A levels just to fail out of college. I can do this!!!

BEDA #26

Hello. 

remind me to delete all incriminating posts after I finish BEDA. 

I read nicolas's post today and he said he wasn't having a very good day. I'm glad you shared it with us. Everyone has grumpy days. Everyone is allowed to feel grumpy, and their grumpiness is valid.

I've turned off twitter now because it's too overwhelming. It's like there are a million different people all shouting at the tops of their voices, and everyone is important, and sometimes it's too much. I've got it off. haha me turning it off sounds so monumental. It's because I usually have it on a tab somewhere, humming in the background. It's like going to Sainsbury's when you have to buy actual groceries. There's too much stimulation for me; it's too confusing and too big and there are too many things to choose from. It's taken a while to get used to. I'm ok going to big hypermarkets when I don't have to buy groceries for myself, or when buying fun stuff. Like soda and cupcakes. 

there are too many THINGS in sainsbury's. also I'm slowly learning to buy groceries for myself, and used to get really annoyed when I'd go grocery shopping with my dad, and he didn't have a list. How does one go grocery shopping without a list?! he would end up buying too many things that don't fit into our fridge or cupboard, or buying things we already had. When there are things that need to be done, and I need to buy This and This and This but not be distracted by, say, ice cream, it takes a lot of effort. Also stressful when trying to find something on your list but the stupid store is so big. 

They don't have mid-sized supermarkets in my area. Like there's tesco express, but that's too small, and the regular Tesco is too big, and the people in my neighbourhood hate Tesco or Sainsbury's or any other hypermarket so I can't choose either of them, so I can't ever go to sainsbury's even though it has everything in one place and things with labels on them. I can't tell parsnips and turnips and swedes apart because a week ago I didn't know what the hell a swede was. (the vegetable, not Martina or Martin.) Because what I know as a turnip in singapore, is not a turnip here! it's something else! -_-" and in the corner shops they don't have labels for the vegetables. I don't know if the grapes they sell in the market are seedless or not. I don't like grapes with seeds in them. 

ok good night. I'm tired.

BEDA #25: old wrock nostalgia

There are some people whom I don't like because I'm jealous of them, which is a really bad thing to feel, right? You're not supposed to be jealous of people but you are. So I stop following them on social media for a bit. Happens to real people too. That's why I'm so bad at making friends. Or rather, staying friends with people. Because I don't know when it is appropriate to say, "hey, want to hang out?" without seeming clingy or weird. I should just suck it and ask them. Now I remember feeling like this when I would text darran or sarah, but I did it anyway and hid my phone from sight. 

I miss 2007. haha suddenly I'm thinking about "imagining the future is a kind of nostalgia". WrockFans on twitter asked us about how we found out about wrock, and I got introduced to it by spinnerscast, a harry potter podcast, in january 2008. Those were the days. I feel so old now. Before that I started listening to mugglecast, I think in 2005. It would take ages for me download their hour-long podcasts onto my mp3 player, and I'd listen to them as I went to sleep and laugh at micah's goats and at their in-jokes. I didn't know *anyone* who listened to mugglecast. 

I just miss it a lot, and looking at spinnerscast's old website, where they're talking about Pheonix Rising, and theorizing about DH-- it makes me wistful. And I thought by moving to another, more "western" country would change all that. Which is what I thought at 15. I thought it would be easier to find people who were into the same things as I was interested in, and I could have that shared fan experience. THIS IS BECOMING A PITY PARTY SO FAST

It was raining today. I did my laundry today. It stank. Before I did it, though. Now I've done it! and there's another load that needs to be doing, but can't be done until the current load is dry. Also I need to do the dishes. Tomorrow.

Just booked a hostel for chicago. ERK summer plans they make me nervous. Because this means I'm COMMITTING to something. Everything makes me nervous. I don't know how to be an adult.

People notice that I'm quiet. A friend asked me a while ago if there was something wrong with me, or if I was "just quiet". I didn't take offense at all, it has just made me think. My mum warned me about this, though. When I was 11. She said that people will think something is wrong with you if you don't talk. or something to that effect. I don't think I'll be properly adult if I don't get over my quietness. I don't know how. I mean it's not stopping me business-wise; I can work, get paid. With this life modeling thing I have to negotiate fees even. I can talk to people professionally in "work mode", but I'm quiet in "social mode". I don't know how to get over it. I've been trying to for, quite honestly, my whole life. It's improved once I've gotten experience in talking to different people who weren't from school.

It's late. I'm sleepy. Not going to bother finishing my train of thought. night, sleep tight. keep safe.

BEDA #24: uh huh her show

oh man I almost forgot to do BEDA today. and it's ridiculously late. I've just gotten back from an Uh Huh Her concert. Interesting observation! Europeans pronounce "uh huh her" as "ooooh who her". Well at least the italian girl in the bathroom and my old roommate from Cologne pronounces it that way. In my head it's pronounced "ah hah her".

Ok to be honest, I can't tell most of their songs from each other; they all sound the same to me. Maybe I have a bad listening ear or whatever. The only ones I kind of know are Black and Blue, Disdain, and Another Day. I'm pretty sure this was the last encore song they played, and I only know for sure because they said the title before they sang it. xD

They sang it acoustic. Acoustically? It's supposed to be an adjective, but I don't know if "acoustic" is an adjective or a noun. Oh wait it's an adjective because it's before a noun, like "acoustic set". OH RIGHT I was looking for the adverb version of "acoustic". This is how they sound acoustically!



aiyah I don't like that they're going to put out an acoustic-only album. Most of the reason why I like them is because of their dance-y music. There's no point in an UHH acoustic song because you can't dance to it, and the lyrics don't mean anything. At least to me. ahahaha I couldn't even identify 70% of the set they played today. um. hahahahaha I'm trying to come up with reasons why I went. Hmm. When I was in LA they were playing there! But it was a >21 show, wtf?! German roommate from cologne, frieda, (the only other person whom I've met irl who knows of UHH) told me to go borrow ID from the asian girls living in the apartment next door. So I went next door to their apartment and introduced myself and spoke mandarin. Only 1-2 of them were chinese, the rest were japanese, I think. But they weren't over 21 either, so no ID. xD Long story short, I was pissed that I missed their show, so I told myself that I needed to go watch them when it was announced that they were coming here.

Most of the reason why I felt pissed that I'd missed them was this song:



I would put this on repeat, because it was one of the few dance-y non-mainstream songs that were sexy. There. I said it. The songs make me feel all supergay and sexy. *sheepish* I'm laughing so much as I type this. In their favor, they did play this song at the show, and people were jumping along to it. Honestly? I think that the fact that Leisha Hailey (the blonde one) was on the L word, and because they're so gay and sexy is probably mostly why they're so appealing, and the lyrics are secondary. Even frieda asked me "which one" I liked, leisha or camila.

(sidenote: I was looking up leisha hailey's wikipedia page, and she dated KD Lang?! okay she gets all of the awards. No wonder! There were all these older dykes at the show, who danced more than the younger ones. xD I rarely see older dykes. I'M SORRY I'm very sheltered okay~ Or maybe I've seen them in singapore but they don't go to clubs.)

Also, the show! I've never seen so many lesbians in one place. But really. There seemed like, what, 10 guys in the entire 1000-odd crowd? And a handful of transguys. They had a unisex toilet, which was great. I've never seen so many girls making out in one place. SERIOUSLY. I'd be standing there, minding my own business, watching the show, where every other couple is touching each other's butts, whispering excessively into each other's ears, cuddling. Then you're trying to dance but noooo there's people making out in front of you~~ then you shuffle sideways. and to the back of the room. and to the side. and another making-out couple will be lurking, ready to catch you just when you're not paying attention. Then they turn up right in front of you. The funniest. The lead singer of the show opener, Sick of Sarah, was like, "hello ladies, and one gentleman".

Allow me to devote an entire paragraph to the lead singer of sick of sarah, whose name I don't even know. BUT she's so hot okay. Even the girls on the train home were gushing about her HIPS. what even. The vocals sound like tegan and sara. They had to man their own merch table, and when the lead singer was at the merch table, she had a whole bunch of groupies surrounding her, and getting her to take pictures with them. She was charming the pants off them, me included. Maybe not literally. I was just standing there and staring *_* trying to be as unobtrusive as possible. I like her hairrrrr and it's all swoosh and her sunglasses, and when she's onstage she likes to show everyone her tummy, which is perfectly FINE BY ME~~ *googles*

her name's ABISHA UHL. with a name like that, you don't need chiseled hips. ABISHAAA~~